Zolan's Blog

I'm a firm believer that wisdom is knowing that you don't know and control everything. Once you know you are fallible then you realize that you do not always make the right decisions or even when you do they don't work out as well as planned. Once you realize that, you can more fairly judge what's going on around you.

That being said, the name "wisdom tooth" makes a whole lot more sense. I realize that it would have eventually had to been removed but I am beginning to realize that right or not, this has been an unexpected ordeal. I've had an interesting time with it, here is what happened.

I'd like to start out by telling you that I fear the dentist. All growing up I've lived with the problem that the dentists have a hard time deadening my teeth before they work on them. Therefore, the thought of having a tooth split into four pieces and removed piecemeal was not a warm and fuzzy one.

Well, I delivered this information to the oral surgeon as directly as possible with no possible way to misunderstand me. He suggested I be completely put out via general anesthetic but that costs at least and extra $400 which, by my previous blog post you might guess, I just used a chunk of my money on something else.

I told him I would prefer not to be knocked out and he prescribed something called (I'll try to spell it right.) "Halcion". He told me that this along with the nitrous usually makes people sleep through the extraction. I, of course, thought it was impossible to sleep through them ripping a tooth out of your head but at least it might take the edge off.

I dropped by my pharmacy and gave the lady at the counter my prescription. She asked me why I had been prescribed this medicine and I told her I was getting my wisdom tooth pulled and was a little nervous. She said something to the effect of, "This medicine is for a bit more than 'a little nervous'!", and I confessed that I may have under-exaggerated my fear a little. She told me that I would definitely need someone to drive me which my fiance had already taken the day off to do. I thanked her and got a good feeling about this drug. It might actually do what the oral surgeon said it would. That is what I thought. I was wrong. It did so much more...

The day of the appointment arrived and I was to take my medicine an hour before the appointment. Well, I had decided to work the first half of that day so I took my medicine and waited for my fiance to come and get me. We work at the same place on different floors, but I had been unclear as to where we were to meet. I was waiting for her on my floor, she was waiting in the car. I hung out with my friend Vicky at work as the drugs started kicking in waiting for Tracey, my fiance, to arrive. I kept getting goofier and goofier and finally after a call on my cell I realized that there had been a flaw in our communication. Tracey asked Vicky if she wouldn't mind walking me down to the car as I apparently didn't sound capable of making it to the vehicle by myself.

After a thrillingly embarrassing ride in the elevator with Vicky and a few other coworkers I made it to the car and we were off. At this point I remember thinking, "This is some good stuff, maybe this appointment won't be so bad after all." Little did I know the medication hadn't really kicked in yet.

We got to the mall. As a side note, that is a horrible place for a dentists office. Who wants to be drugged and walk through a busy mall? Anyway, we got to the mall and the feeling of confusion was getting stronger. Tracey walked me to the bathroom and I'll never forget the feeling I had when I entered. The walls and floor were tiled with this black and white tiny pattern and it caused an optical illusion. If possible, I caught my first glimpse of the fourth dimension and it was WILD. At the very least I can say I remembered going to the bathroom (this time) but the drugs would soon kick in.

We went and sat in the waiting room. I somewhat remember the walk back but the rest of my memory is flashes of bits and pieces. Here are few of the things that I know and remember. Tracey took a picture of me and sent it to work. I look like I'm living life to the fullest and I'm sure that is how I felt. That picture is probably posted at work and probably on some website as well. (UPDATE: I've found out that either before or after the picture was taken I was blowing spit bubbles. Good lord. ) Next, I had to go to the bathroom again and Tracey walked me to the bathroom in the dentists office and asked me if I washed my hands afterwards which I assume was rather embarrassing. I, however, don't remember any of that.

Next thing I remember, I was sitting in the dentists chair and they were hooking me up to the nitrous. I think I remember getting the numbing shots. Then there was a few seconds of drilling that I remembered and next thing was them sewing me shut. I wish I would have been more awake at this time to ask them what the hell he was thinking, but that will come later.

I do remember the oral surgeon telling me that everything went smoothly and he didn't damage any nerves which I thought was a good thing. I remember the front counter and them telling me I could go. I also think I may have gone to the bathroom one more time in the four dimensional bathroom.

I don't remember going to the car, and I don't remember much of the drive. I do recall Tracey asking me for my Kaiser card at which point she got my vicodin for me and then we went and picked up her daughter from school. I don't remember picking her up, but I know we did just because she was with us when we got home.

The next thing I remember I was calling my buddy Chad because we made a deal that we would call each other when we were drugged up just because it would be funny. I don't however remember what the conversation was. Then my senses started coming back to me as I was eating some KFC mac and cheese. That stuff is GOOD.

Well, days of Vicoden were ahead of me. I was in a fair amount of pain. For two nights the pain got worse and I couldn't sleep. We made an emergency appointment at the dentist and it was decided that he would cut my stitches and put the nastiest stuff man has ever conceived into the hole where my tooth used to be. This stuff he put in there tasted like I took a clove cigarette and chewed it up and was forced to swallow it. It stunk. It tasted horrible. It made my entire mouth numb. I almost vomited. But in the end it was like he had installed a little chunk of incense into my mouth which was then fun for hours...

I found out that the inside of my cheek had been sewn to my gums. He said this was done on purpose to cause a protective flap. I'm fairly certain that it was done with the purpose to cause me pain but I have no proof. Anyway, it seems that two stitches were made to hold the flap there. One ripped through my cheek flesh and the other had still been holding tight. The new dentist prescribed some Percoset to aid in me sleeping through the night. Sleep through the night or hallucinate that I'm being attacked by some crazed neutered chinchillas that have a fetish for biting my toes. Well, that may have been an overstatement but seriously that is some powerful stuff.

So It's been a day since that happened and my cheek is beginning to move back to where it is supposed to go. I'm still in pain and have another appointment on Wednesday. In the mean time it is Ibuprofin, Vicodin, and Percoset until it heals.

UPDATE: I have since gone back to the oral surgeon. He removed that little packet of now putrid tasting death that had once tasted like cloves and diagnosed me with dry socket. This was not a huge surprise to me due to the pain I had been in. He gave me a squirty thing to clean out the crater in the back of my mouth and told me I may potentially have to rinse this way for months. The pain is slowly going away so as long as I can keep from hurting myself further I should be fine.

The moral of this story is, I lost a bit of wisdom (my wisdom tooth), and in doing so realized how many different things can go bad that are completely out of my control thus gaining a lot of wisdom in return.

I also came to realize even more through this entire episode that I'm one lucky man that has a damn good woman that takes care of him.